Condoms

 There we were, in the supermarket. She had a pair of stockings to buy as she was ill dressed for the wind outside. I had a random assortment of shit: a drinking container made for tea, doublemint gum, and two scented candles. There was one item I knew I needed, as I had only one condom left in my apartment. I knew we were going back to my apartment, and I knew what would happen if we went there, and I knew that it may happen more than once. However, the prospect of grabbing condoms of the rack while we were
shopping together seemed presumptious. I kept thinking that it would look bad to just say...

"Hey, I gotta grab one last thing." [pick up pack of condoms] "I'll be needing these later, if you know what I'm saying." [give nudge with my elbow]

How would she react? To giggle in agreement does not sound that farfetched, but at the time it was not how the scenario was playing in my mind...

"And why do you want condoms? Do you plan on having sex anytime soon?"

I decided to not buy the condoms and proceed cooly. Things went as I had hoped, or as I should have figured, as badly as possible...

(In a very Asian accent)LH : "Why do you only have one condom? Do you not like fucking?"